FOR THE KINGDOM WOMAN WHO’S BEEN BUILDING THIS THING FOR MONTHS OR YEARS AND IS JUST PLAIN WORN OUT… 

You’re tired.

Not sleepy-tired. The kind where you’ve been at this for months, maybe years, and it’s still not launched.

So somebody told you to give yourself grace. Maybe a coach. Maybe a friend. Maybe you’ve been saying it to yourself. 

Sister, I will never say that to you. Because you can’t do it. Not because you don’t “deserve it,” but because grace isn’t yours to hand out. It belongs to God, and that changes everything about what you do next. 

Here’s the word God gave me that prompted me to write down this message for you: Give yourself a break. Breathe. Receive the grace of God and the peace of Christ. And then keep going. 

Read that again slowly. Maybe put your hand on your chest and let the Holy Spirit tell you whether that’s a word for you in this season. 

🎥 Prefer to WATCH the podcast instead of just listening? 👉 Catch this week’s episode of the video podcast on my YouTube channel:

Let’s Define Grace 

Here’s why we say “give ourselves grace:” We just don’t know the real definition of grace.

If I had to define it in biblical terms, here’s what I’d tell you: Grace is an empowering force from God that gives you the ability to do the thing you could not do on your own. 

It takes the power of God, working in you and through you by the Holy Spirit, to give it to you. 

So read that definition again and you’ll see the problem. You cannot give yourself grace, because you don’t have any to give. Grace is God’s. He puts it in you and works it through you.

What you actually mean when you say it is something like: I need to give myself a break. Or I need to receive the mercy of God. Or there’s an opportunity for me here. 

Those are biblical. Say those instead. 

Now Watch What the Scriptures Do With It 

2 Corinthians 12:9. Paul keeps asking God to remove a “thorn” that’s been irritating him, and God answers him with: My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. 

So the requirement to receiving God’s grace is admitting you’re weak. That you can’t do this on your own. That’s the exact condition God is looking for before His grace shows up.

1 Corinthians 15:9-10. Paul says he’s the least of these (apostoles) because he persecuted the very people he’s now sent to serve. And then: By the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace toward me was not in vain. On the contrary, I worked harder than any of them, though it was not I, but the grace of God that is with me. 

Look at what he does there. He doesn’t do false humility and say it had nothing to do with him. He worked harder than all of them. He just refuses to call it his own strength.

That’s the posture. Work hard, and give God the credit for the power that made it possible. Amen! 

Now the Part That’s Going to Sting 

Sis, you’re likely worn out because you’ve been striving. And I’m going to say the harder version of that: It’s likely you’re worn out because of sin. 

I know. You didn’t come here to be told you’re sinning. Check yourself anyway, because that’s what we’re supposed to do. Here’s how it tends to happen… 

You hit a challenge. You can’t figure it out. So you push harder. You grind. More effort. More striving. More overthinking at 2am. And where’s that coming from? It’s coming from believing you have to solve your own problem. That you have to produce the solution yourself. 

But the whole New Testament says the opposite. Your job is not to figure it out. Your job is to enter His rest and let Him be the solution. When we insist on doing it ourselves and then bring it to God asking “ Is this good enough?”, we’re bypassing the very thing Jesus died to give us access to.

That’s a spirit of religion, Sis. Legalism. It says “God said it, so now I have to go perform it.” But scripture says He will perform His word and He is working in you to will and to do according to His good pleasure. He’s working it in you, and then you walk it out. 

Hebrews 4:15-16. We don’t have a high priest who can’t sympathize with our weakness. So let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

Not the throne of striving. Not the throne of figuring it out. The throne of grace.

Where You Learned to Do It Alone 

Can I ask you something? Why do you even believe you have to figure this out by yourself? 

I’ll tell you where I learned it. As a young person, I got praise when I figured things out. I got accolades when I did it excellently in my own strength, my own effort, my own energy. 

And that praise felt like love to me. So I learned early: keep pushing, keep going, keep proving. My value came from being the one who figured it out and set the cadence. 

If that’s you too, hear me on this: Even in the seasons where nobody was coming to help you and it looked like you were doing it all, you weren’t doing it alone. God was standing with you. God was handing you tools. God was handing you grace. 

It wasn’t your strength then either. 

Back in 2004, a prophet visited our church in NYC and the leadership of the church gathered in my pastor’s living room one afternoon to receive from him. When he got to me he said, God made you strong. But your assignment in this life is to work in the doorway of grace.

That was twenty-two years ago. I’m 52 now, and that tension has never once let up.

Every single day there’s a decision: Do this in my own strength, which I’m fully capable of, or pick up the grace. And every time I pick up the grace, I get farther, faster, with far less weariness. 

Rest Isn’t Stopping 

Before we get to the yoke, let me show you something in John 4. Jesus is weary from walking. He sits down at the well. And then He asks the woman for a drink. 

He was working. That was ministry. And before it was over she was saved and running back to her village to tell everybody. He rested His body and then worked from that rest at the same time.

There’s a meme going around that says when you’re tired, learn to rest, not quit. Amen to that. But Kingdom women get something better. The rest God offers doesn’t require us to be inactive while we are empowered by it. 

And let me be clear about what rest is not. It’s not quietly quitting. It’s not fading to the back hoping nobody notices you left. That’s not rest, that’s exiting the work.

The Yoke: What Jesus Was Actually Describing 

Matthew 11:28-30. The Message calls it learning the unforced rhythms of grace. The ESV calls it rest. Those are the same thing, and that’s not an accident. Grace is what carries you into rest and keeps you working effectively from rest. 

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. 

Now here’s the piece almost nobody explains. He is not telling you to stop working. He’s handing you a yoke, and a yoke is a symbol of work.

In biblical-era farming, when a young ox needed training, the farmer yoked it to a master ox. One beam across both animals. And they paired them deliberately: the young, reactive, untrained calf that would spook or bolt, joined to the steady, mature ox that already knew the commands, the voice of the master, and the routine of the field. 

Sit with what that means. 

The master carries nearly all of the weight and the strain. The calf isn’t figuring anything out. The calf isn’t carrying the load. 

The only time the calf strains is when it bolts, lags, or gets spooked. That’s it. The struggle only shows up when it pulls against the yoke. 

That’s why I told you the weariness might be pointing at sin. The strain is the tell. If you’re worn out, check whether you’ve been pulling against the thing you said you’d submit to. 

And when the calf does spook, the yoke holds it. It physically keeps the young one in the direction, the cadence, and the task. That’s what you stepped into when you took His yoke. 

The calf learns the cues by feeling the master respond. Not by hearing the driver’s voice and interpreting it alone. It learns turn, stop, slow, go by staying close enough to feel how the master moves first. 

And over time, the student builds real stamina and understanding. Eventually the student becomes a master ox. But you don’t skip the yoke to get there. 

So Are You Strategy Switching? 

Let me get practical, because this is where it shows up in your business.

Are you the woman who keeps switching strategies? Who gets to 80% launched every single time and never crosses the line? You tell yourself it’s because you haven’t found the right approach yet. It isn’t. It’s because you keep trying to figure it out on your own, and every time it gets hard you bolt in a new direction.

That’s the calf straining against the yoke. Every time. 

And here’s the practical side of what Jesus modeled. Apprenticeship was normal in biblical times. It still works now. 

Strategy is one piece. Your framework is one piece. But you also need somebody a few steps ahead who’s already done it, who can say no, no, girl, stick with me on the day you get spooked. 

You need a master ox. And there is no shame in that. It’s a biblical pattern.

What I Want You to Hear 

Give yourself a break. Breathe. Receive the grace of God and the peace of Christ. And then keep going. 

You are not being asked to stop building. You’re being asked to stop building alone and in your own strength. 

There is a cadence to grace that doesn’t wear you out. And even though you can’t give it to yourself you can receive it. Will you?

🎯 Next Steps + Resources For You:

✅ Come to the FREE Called to Build Workshop. Tuesday, September 15th at 7pm ET. For 60 interactive minutes, let me be a master ox for you. I’ll give you the four practical things you must have in place to actually get launched online, we’ll figure out which ones are missing or misaligned in your process, and I’ll show you how to fix them. Plus Q&A at the end where you can ask me anything. Can’t make it live? There’s a 7-day replay. But you’ve got to save your seat. 

👉 http://www.jesusgirlgang.com/calledtobuild

✅ Join me live for Get Ready with God. Weekday mornings at 7:30am ET on Instagram and Facebook, and Thursdays are Kingdom business focused. This episode came straight out of one of those mornings. 

👉 Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/ericapyle  
👉 Facebook: http://www.ericapyle.com/BizFB 

✅ Subscribe to the podcast. New episodes every Thursday. This is where breakthrough gets built, the kind that changes the pattern for you, your family, and the generations behind you.  

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📖 Scriptures Referenced in This Episode: John 4:1-30 · 2 Corinthians 12:9 · 1 Corinthians 15:9-10 · Romans 7:18-25 · Hebrews 4:15-16 · Matthew 11:28-30 · James 1:21 

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Erica co-leads a local church alongside her husband, Doug, in Tampa, Florida called REVIVE Church of Tampa. You can visit the church’s website for more information about who we are, what we believe and how we show up as the Church in the heart of West Tampa and beyond.

REVIVE Church of Tampa

REVIVE Church of Tampa streams service live on Sunday mornings at 11am ET. You can find that livestream on our church Facebook page:

Live Service – Sundays at 11am ET

If you’re interested in joining the online campus of REVIVE Church of Tampa, you are welcome to join our community group on Facebook where we offer weekly discussion around the Friday and Sunday messages as well as discipleship Zoom groups and the opportunity to host others in your home as you stream services. You can find us here:

The ROCC: REVIVE Online Campus Community

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About this podcast:

Welcome to the Jesus Girl Gang Kingdom Business Podcast with Erica Pyle, where we dive deep into Biblical mindsets, strategies, and inspiration to help you launch and thrive in the God-given business or ministry you’re called to steward.

Join Erica, co-lead pastor of REVIVE Church of Tampa, and founder/lead mentor of The Jesus Girl Gang, an online, group coaching mentorship for Christian women with a pioneering spirit, as she shares powerful teachings, practical advice, and pivotal strategies for breakthrough living without compromising on the things that matter most to you. With over 13 years of experience in pastoral ministry alongside her husband Doug, Erica brings a wealth of knowledge and a passionate heart for helping you live out God’s best for your life.

Each week, tune in for transformative insights that will empower you to build a Kingdom business or ministry, nurture your personal well-being, and create balanced, prosperous relationships. If you’re a faith-driven woman seeking to align your life with God’s purpose, you’re in the right place.

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